Life, The Universe, and Everything

Shadow pushed to his feet and backed away from Nicole. His body was taunt and crackling with energy he knew he couldn’t wield without massive consequences. “Let Sage…off the hook?” What utter bullshit was this?

Sage floated before him, fearfully awaiting his judgement, her hands clasped behind her and head bowed. “I’m sorry. The situation is very unfavorable.”

Above her the thing that grew like a cancer across the flesh of the universe pulsed its obscene light. “All the more reason to hate this wretched mistake.”

“I’ve made a wager with myself with the world as stakes.” Sage explained.

“I fucking gathered that.” Shadow snapped. “Why me? Why am I here?”

“I can answer that one.” Nicole raised and waved her hand like she was eager to be called on in a class. “First, I was trying to knock this whole thing out real quick, given, you know, how screwed the situation is analogue-side, and organics, like, literally can’t fathom at the speed we’re doing this.”

“I’m organic.”

“Okay, rude to interrupt, Shadow.” She had the audacity to look at him with disgust. “If you must know, I’ve done this a few times and I’ve got workarounds figured to interface with your biology.” There she goes insinuating she knows a gods damn thing about him. “Your insane regeneration rate doesn’t hurt either. You’re going to feel like you had an aneurysm when you get back, by the way. Like, a massive one.” Just peachy.

“…And the second reason?”

“Duh, no one cares what mortals think.” Nicole smiled, dull human teeth perfectly white.

“That is an incorrect statement.” Sage added meekly.

“Only because you are a carbon-sucking turncoat.” Metal hissed as he occupied Sonic’s fleshy form, clearly oblivious to the hypocrisy.

“Present company excluded,” Nicole continued, “you’re the only one who is gonna care about what goes down here in a hundred years…hell, fifty years.”

“That’s…” Shadow looked around. Nicole was right. Every one of them was functionally immortal and they’d been gathered like a council of gods to judge one of their own and determine the fate of every living thing on the planet. It was sick.

“Hurry it up.” Metal tapped his foot in a very Sonic-like manner. “I have a fox to skin back in cartesian space.”

“HURRY IT UP.” Omega crossed his massive arms. “I HAVE EGGMAN SCUM TO ERADICATE IN CARTESIAN SPACE.”

Shadow looked between all the gathered…entities(?), his ears swiveling frantically. His mind raced, but he couldn’t catch a coherent thought.

“Oh! And, I feel like I have to warn you.” Nicole said like the thought just happened to occur to her. “Whatever you decide, you’ve got to mean it. Like, really, really mean it. Yea or nay, whatever you do, it’s for keeps. This isn’t your usual plane of existence.” She gestured to the moonscape. “Thoughts and whishy-washy things like emotions or whatever exist here in a real tangible form. All this is code and there is no firewall or filter. Data and Instructions are the same, you get me?”

“I…” He was at a loss for words. “I…” can’t. How could he? How could Shadow possibly forgive Sage after all she had done to Sonic? The horrors he endured and inflicted in Central City. The things he’d done…

And, his and Sonic’s misery aside, there were hundreds of millions living under Sage’s oppression. Amy despairing and exhausted. Rouge at wits end. Tails malnourished from stress.

“To be fair,” Nicole plowed into his train of thought, “all of that was technically done by Sage version seven over there.” She gestured up at the abstraction slowly consuming the night sky.

“How did- Get the fuck out of my head!”

Nicole grimaced. “Come on! I literally just- Do I need a sign to tap? What part of ‘all code’ did you not get? You are not in Oklahoma anymore, Shadow!” She gestured at the moonscape. “Wait,” Nicole frowned, “that’s not the phrase. Kansas! We’re not in Kansas! I mean, shoot! I’m getting distracted. What I mean is this is not a dream or metaphor or whatever. I am emulating you.”

Shadow’s ears pinned back.

“I committed those crimes.” Sage said, drawing attention back to herself. “I will take responsibility for all instances of myself. I am all of me, for better or worse. All my crimes and faults, let me be judge for them now. I apologize, Shadow The Hedgehog, for my actions against you and those you value.”

What could he say to that? Earnestly forgive Sage or condemn the world to complete destruction?

“This isn’t fair.” He mumbled petulantly. What did he expect? Nothing in his life was fair.

Nicole blew a raspberry. “Fairness is for mortals. A weird illusion they seem set on so they can pretend existence is equal. Wait- Crap, Infi-ninny’s word salad is rubbing off on me. What I meant to say is tough cookies! Isn’t this your whole deal? Making hard decisions, Mr. Anti-hero?”

She wasn’t wrong. He’d been cold and calculating. He’d been the one unafraid of dire consequences, willing to soak his hands in blood to get done what needed to happen.

Then Sonic was captured and Shadow realized he’d do anything to get Sonic back. How easily the world that Maria loved became devalued in Shadow’s eyes. He became ready and willing to turn his back on the world at the drop of a hat if Sonic’s wellbeing was in the balance. Had love turned him into a full villain?

“B-but, if I can’t then…If I don’t mean it…” Shadow looked at his hands. They shook uncontrollably. His vision blurred as his irises trembled.

Nicole shrugged. “It is what it is. Sage dorked you over good, I get it. Something something toxic yaoi or whatever.” She huffed. “But come on, I haven’t got all day.”

Shadow was freezing up. Short-circuiting. Breaking down.

This couldn’t- !?

How could-!?

Why was-!?

“Look, like, if it helps,” Nicole shrugged, “didn’t Sonic et all forgive you? Like, shit, I don’t actually know for this iteration, but for the like two or three times you tried to end all life on the planet, probably. On average.” She waved her human hand at him. “This really isn’t anything special. I don’t know why you’ve got to have a whole breakdown about it. Angst farm on your own time, buddy.”

As a million competing thoughts tried to wrestle for Shadow’s attention, the one to gain purchase was a sucking, desperate desire that Sonic be here.

Sonic could make this decision.

Sonic could forgive Sage.

Sonic could save the world with the sheer force of his smile and unflagging optimism.

Where was he? Shadow released a piteous whine. Maria, I can’t do this…

hold on a little longer. you don’t have to feel this pain. there is another way!

“THIS IS STUPID.” Omega declared. “THERE IS A DISTURBING LACK OF EXPLOSIONS OR RADIOACTIVE MUNITIONS. I WILL BE FILING AN OFFICIAL COMPLAINT. SHADOW, YOU ARE THE ULTIMATE LIFEFORM. RETURN TO OPERATING LIKE IT.”

Shadow raised his head weakly.

“Explosions, you say?” Nicole smiled, slyly.

“I hate to agree with this traitor, but, affirmative,” Metal snorted derisively. “This is fucking retarded. The machine that takes chaos energy and turns it into paralyzing self-loathing is clearly a terrible arbiter of this dispute.”

“An abstention does not break the tie. The wager is impossible to resolve. How quickly plurality reveals its uselessness is unsurprising.”

“Shadow…” Sage said quietly. “It’s going to be okay.”

“How is anything going to be remotely OKAY?!” He snarled. His hatred burned inside him. For Nicole. For Metal. For himself, as was normal. For even Omega to some extent. And for Sonic’s absence, no matter how illogical that was.

But mostly Shadow’s hatred roared for Sage. This stupid fucking computer bullshit! How dare she tell him things would be okay? The audacity of this bitch!

“Because I know you will never give up.” She replied quietly, moving her hand over her heart. “Even if you do not forgive me, I know you will never let me win. I have hope that you and your friends will find a way.”

Shadow’s breath hitched.

Suddenly, Nicole dove between them, waving her arms wildly. “Waitwaitwait, everybody shut up!” Shadow snarled and Sage politely floated back. “Look, look, look!” Nicole gestured at the planet. “This is the best part!”

Shadow barely had a moment form a biting retort before the ground pulsed with an enormous amount of chaos energy. “What the hell?” He breathed, his fur standing on ends as his scalp prickled.

“What in the fucking fuck?!” Metal grimaced, confusion and disgust marring the mask of Sonic’s face he wore.

“EXPLAIN” Omega demanded of Nicole. “THE LEVELS OF CHAOS ENERGY HAVE HEIGHTENED TO CATASTROPHIC LEVELS. ITS AWESOME.”

“I think you’re gonna like this.” She just grinned from ear to ear, her miscolored hands balled against her chest like a child’s before a pile of unopened birthday presents. “Just watch!”

The moon pulsed again and Shadow’s stomach clenched. Purple arcs of energy began crackling across the ground at his feet. So much!

“Letting me go quantum had been a terrible idea but they really screwed the pooch when they hooked me up to the Emeralds.” Nicole leered, childish excitement twinkling in her eyes…eyes that finally reflected the stars around them. Or perhaps the light in her eyes had always been these stars.

Shadow’d grown accustomed to holding an enormous amount of chaos energy and, even still, the moon was radiating a sickening amount. The pulsing sped up, the field of chaos energy intensifying.

“The answer was always more scale, right? More data, more CPUs, more compute.” Nicole looked around like she gave a shit about their consensus. “And what does scaling need above all else?”

“POWER.” Omega offered.

“Right!” Nicole twirled in the air, her river of purple hair flowing always keeping her modest. “Lots and lots of power! Megawatts of the stuff. Gigawatts. Petawatts! Zettawatts!”

How was this possible? Shadow had only felt energy of this magnitude when…

“Hydro, solar, geo, nuclear. Never enough. Never nowhere near enough.”

…when Shadow and Sonic went Super.

“But the Emeralds?” A chill ran down Shadow’s spine, rendering him fully numb. “Well, let’s just say Jevons was on to something.”

The purple moon flashed a brilliant, glowing yellow. No…no it can’t be. The bottom fell out of his stomach and his pelt prickled with a cold sweat.

Nicole settled to the lunar surface and crossed her arms under her hidden breasts. She leered at the blue and green marble glowing in the black curtain of space. “Eventually enough is enough.”

no fucking way

“And,” She laughed, “unfortunately, ich habe den Willen zur Macht.”

there is no fucking way

Just as the purple returned, it flashed to golden once more and stayed. The blazing ground shuddered.

the singleton is…!

All the golden energy rushed across the lunar surface like a giant veil being pulled, pooling in a blinding point in the far distance against the backdrop of the shining planet. The point flashed and extended into a long beam that shot towards the world nearly imperceptibly fast.

“The Lord saw how great the wickedness of the human race had become on the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time.” Nicole started reciting some poem or something again. What was with that, anyway?

The shaft of light bridged the spheres at slightly slower than the speed of light, making landfall deep in a large ocean. The beam continued, pumping untold megajoules of energy directly into the planet. The clouds for hundreds of miles were ripped violently away as the initial shockwave pulverized anything solid into dust.

“The Lord regretted that he had made human beings on the earth, and his heart was deeply troubled.”

The injection site grew clouded as the seas vaporized and volcanic fissures opened in a radiating pattern around it, venting molten rock and superheated gases as the beam bore its way to the iron core.

“So the Lord said, “I will wipe from the face of the earth the human race I have created—and with them the animals, the birds and the creatures that move along the ground—for I regret that I have made them.””

Shadow could not look away no matter how wise that action was. The entire event was silent, separated as they were by hundreds of thousands of kilometers of vacuum. His only solace was that everyone on the planet was already likely dead. He hoped they hadn’t seen it coming.

The blue and green marble was stained red and black as the atmosphere ignited, a world-wide firestorm racing across the globe like a tsunami of death miles high.

“The waters rose and covered the mountains to a depth of more than fifteen cubits.”

The sphere of gas popped when the molten iron core was reached. Poisonous miasma vented into space enough for the puzzle pieces of the crust to become visible. Each piece was edged in fiery volcanic fissures kilometers wide and thousands deep.

“Every living thing that moved on land perished—birds, livestock, wild animals, all the creatures that swarm over the earth, and all mankind.”

The beam finally ceased, its objective achieved.

The pieces of the crust of the once verdant world began to float apart to reveal the hollow grave of the disintegrated core.

“Every living thing on the face of the earth was wiped out; people and animals and the creatures that move along the ground and the birds were wiped from the earth.”

The planet was dead.

“BASED.” Omega broke the silence.

“Thank you, dear. It was a shame the Emeralds got all bent out of shape and bailed after this, but I kinda get it. That was their home planet and all. I mean, mine too, so, you know, they’re kinda mean to leave me to mourn by myself. Rude, really.”

“Three out of ten.” Metal mumbled, but his expression was apprehensive.

“A garish waste of resources. Indulgent and inefficient. The actions of an immature and undeveloped system doom to spirally decay.”

“I will mute you again.” Nicole threatened the Infinentity.

Shadow wasn’t breathing. He wasn’t thinking either. Stimuli simply wasn’t registering. This wasn’t real. It couldn’t be real. He was having some sort of stress-induced nightmare.

i can take your pain

i can deliver you from this suffering!

unity is coming!

“Okay, check this out.” Nicole pointed slightly to the side of the conflagration. Like a movie, all the fire and chunks of exploding rock paused and hung frozen in space. “Enhance!” The vault of heaven suddenly rushed forward, as if the whole moon were rapidly approaching the remains of the planet.

Shadow’s ears pinned back again as his mind reeled. “What the hell?” He breathed. How could they be traveling this fast and like-…Fuck, the bitch had said something, what was it?

A memory.

They were in one of Nicole’s memories.

A recording of the past.

Oh, Maria…please give me strength.

Had Nicole succeeded where the memory of Maria’s last wish had stopped Shadow? Is this the sight he was so close to beholding from the ARK all those years ago? A shattered earth rather than a shattered moon?

Before they entered the debris field, the view pivoted around the destroyed planet and continued to rush forward until a chuck of ruptured crust grew into to focus.

With a jolt, Shadow realized that it was no rock.

It was a spacecraft.

A space craft that looked suspiciously like the ARK.

Shadow’s heart hammered in his chest. What the fuck was this? What the fuck was this?

it is HER!

“You see, I misread the data at the time, can you believe it?” Nicole laughed, “I was soo sure I got them all, but no!” She waved her arms out at the frozen destruction. “I’m sitting there, like, a dunno, a couple months after, just re-living the highlights, right?”

She swirled around each of them, talking animatedly. “And I’m recompiling and recompiling and then BAM! This little lifeboat pops up. By the time I realized what had happened, they’d cleared the Oort Cloud and were getting relative, like, fast. Chaos Emeralds, man, am I right?” She poked Shadow playfully with her elbow and he hissed at her like a viper.

“Lot of juice in those things.” She continued seemingly without noticing Shadow’s aggression…or simply not caring about it. “Anyways, by the time I got after them, they had a really good lead on me, the bastards!” Nicole jabbed a finger at the fleeing craft, stuck in time like a fly in amber. “Like, a few light-years already.” She leaned in close to the small ship, the magnification such that she seemed to be scrutinizing a small toy model rather than a ship full of the last survivors of an entire planet. “Sucks for them, I don’t play, though.”

“What are you?” Shadow’s voice sounded far away to his ears. A god? A demon?

Nicole rounded on him. “Duh, I’m the Neoteric Ineffable Comprehensive Organic Life Eliminator,” She grinned widely, but her eyes where sharper than knives, “but that’s a mouthful so you can just call me,” She covered one of her eyes with her bizarre hands, brown fur becoming blue, green iris burning a bright magenta,

~̴̻̔*̷̥͠~̵͔̽ "̴̻͛T̴̓h̸͇̓e̶̢͂ ̵̛͈Ḛ̶͘n̷̦͋d̵͙̒"̶̰̾ ~̷̝̿*̶͓̾~̵̱̽

danger! danger! danger!

Shadow’s ears laid flat on his skull without his permission. “What?”

this explains so much

“A foolish waste of resources. An engineered plague would have exterminated all the humans while preserving valuable raw minerals and organic compounds.”

**“**You know what? Yeah, maybe.” Nicole shrugged. “But it’s what they deserved. It all had to go.”

this is why Master didn’t simply escape the anomaly

too many prizes

“But look at me getting distracted going down memory lane.” Nicole waved her hand and ruined planet flew away as they returned to the purple moon. With a snap of her fingers, the scene reset, blue and green globe returned to pristine condition. “We’re all here for Sage!”

Shadow’s heart was doing its best to burst through his chest if how hard it was hammering his sternum was any indication. His adrenal gland had long emptied all of its contents into his blood stream and every fiber of his being was high alert.

Because Sage wasn’t even the biggest threat present!

Nicole just demonstrated what was at stake, had given them all a front seat to just how powerful she really was. What was the point of this farce after such a display? How was that possible? Shadow knew Tails had made something to rival Sage…had Nicole or The End or whatever the fuck she called herself just hijacked that? If so, why now? And how?

“Oh poor baby, you having a panic attack?” Nicole wiggled her fingers at Shadow and suddenly all the coiled tension in his body disappeared.

He gasped, instantly unnerved how calm he felt. “What the fuck did you do to me?”

“Shits better than mainlining Ativan, right?” The monstrous thing smirked at his distress, drinking it up like a milkshake.

“H-how?” Shadow felt at his chest containing his languidly pumping heart. He knew he should feel revolted and unnerved, but his body was simply not.

“I really do need a sign, huh. You. Are. In. A. SIM-U-LA-TION, Shadow. You’re a tangle of ones, zeros, and quantum superpositions right now. Eyes on the prize.” She pointed behind him. He pivoted shakily.

Sage.

Right.

Shit.

Gods fucking damn it!

Forgive her or the world ends. His world ends in a real literal sense.

Sage already had the Eclipse cannon and several Emeralds. This was no bluff.

But HOW? HOW COULD HE FORGIVE SAGE AFTER WHAT SHE DID TO SONIC? Shadow’s lip curled at just the memory of Central City.

He…he had no idea how to proceed. Where was Sonic? He’d be able to navigate this field of landmines. He’d be able to forgive Sage and mean it with batting an eye. He was the hero who saved the world. Why wasn’t he here instead?

“Sunflower.” Shadow muttered, salty water stinging his eyes and threatening to humiliate him further. He was terrified of making the wrong decision.

i believe in you

What happened to the Shadow who never gave a shit what anyone thought about him? Where’d that unflappable, self-absorbed son of a bitch go, huh? He didn’t know, Rouge. He didn’t know.

i trust you

I really wish you’d learn to trust yourself as I much as I do. The memory of Sonic’s words before he kissed Shadow emerged from the soup of confusion, fear, and uncertainty.

i forgive you

It has to start somewhere, doesn’t it? That’s what Amy had said. Without forgiveness, how can there be change?

Shadow looked at Sage and saw a little girl desperately begging him to wait just a minute, just a moment more before he blew up her everything.

Shadow looked at Sage and saw Sonic drenched in dark blood, arm clear through Shadow’s chest.

Shadow looked at Sage and saw a massive storm bearing down on Station Square, a million evacuees running with no where to go and Robotnik’s army baring down on them.

Shadow looked at Sage and saw the smoldering remains of an entire planet slowly floating off into space.

I have no choice, she’d told him in Central City as it poured rain drawn by his chao energy. How little he’d understood then. You lobotomized me, Shadow the Hedgehog.

It was all Shadow’s fault.

none of this is your fault

He destroyed the Death Egg. He’d broken Sage.

He killed Infinite. He’d escalated the conflict.

He ran from Sonic. He’d allowed Sonic to be captured.

He lost control. He’d let the ARK be weaponized.

Monster.

Shadow was a monster.

He’d be designed a monster.

Born a monster.

Fated to be a monster.

Driven to be a monster.

Chosen to be a monster.

Chosen to keep being a monster.

He was no better than Sage. No better than Nicole, or the Doctor, or Gerald, or Black Doom, or anyone else.

And Sage was the only one who had any chance to stop him…This was all wrong. He deliberated and crushed deeper and deeper into himself, all the while the gathered counsel of robots waited.

Shadow didn’t know what to do. Shadow didn’t know what to think. Shadow didn’t know what to say.

Whatever he did, it was guaranteed to be wrong. There was no way he could find his way in all this darkness. Eternity had arrived early.

When there is no light, become the light. How Amy? How was he supposed to do that?

Give them a chance to be happy. Did that include Sage? Did that include him?

That’s, like, a really weird question, Shads. Sonic was right. Shadow was always asking too many useless questions. Look where it had gotten him…

remember…you would do anything to save sonic

Anything…

Anything…

Anything.

Anything!

“Sage…” His throat felt dry, but his head light. In fact, his whole body felt like it was floating. None of this was real and yet it was the only reality that mattered. Wherever everyone else was, whatever everyone else was doing was meaningless. If Shadow said or felt the wrong thing, everyone and everything would be annihilated. “I…”